Do You Feel Fine

An illustration of two people in separate houses, waving at each other from their windows.

Image provided by The University of Rhode Island.

Hi friends,

I am writing to all of you before my next planned update because these are such challenging times, and I feel the need to connect. How are you? Are you working from home? Pulling extra clinical time in preparation for a patient surge? Both? I am sending my best to you and your loved ones, especially the vulnerable people in your circle. At this moment I don’t feel like I have advice or answers; I hope my thoughts help you feel seen/ validated.

Social distancing can get lonely. I miss the casual conversation with my wonderful staff and colleagues and even seeing strangers out and about. I have been asking people if they’re willing to turn on their video for remote meetings, and I have been reaching out to my college roommates on our group text and by phone. There’s a fine line between social distancing and social isolation- don’t forget to connect to others even with our current constraints!

Working from home is not the same as going to work. There seems to be a lot of glee over not commuting, working in PJs, etc, on social media, but I really don’t like being in front of a computer entirely by myself all day. I found this article on being productive at home very helpful. For me, the two most important actions are (1) having a defined “start” and “stop” to my workday and (2) getting outside. I am also lucky to have a nice workspace at home. I would encourage you to spend some time/ effort/ money to make your environment more comfortable if you can. Most importantly, set realistic expectations. I initially thought “everything is getting cancelled, I’ll have so much more time to write.” Instead, I am fretting about my aging parents, pondering what I would do if school were cancelled, re-writing my lectures so they work online, and spending way too much time keeping up on terrifying world events.

We all need distraction! I asked my friends for a list of recommendations for what to read/ watch/ listen that will draw me in. Feel free to send me the names of anything that you’ve enjoyed recently. I recommend the book Here and Now and Then by Mike Chen, a Bay Area author, and so far, I’ve enjoyed the series The Expanse (I’m behind, so no spoilers please!). I am also doubling down on exercise and my dance practice- whatever it takes to get out of that anxiety spiral, do it!

Let’s support each other. My best moment today was when I was able to offer to take a work task off someone else’s to-do list. They seemed overwhelmed, and I found it so motivating to be able to help one person in a small way. If ever there was a time to assume positive intent and be patient with each other, it is now. Be kind to yourself, too. If you are having a hard time, ask for help. Remember there are many remote modalities of mental health support (email me if you want to hear more about that). 

We are all in need of good news, so please send me any positive updates that I can share. Feel free to forward/ share this message if it helps. I look forward to seeing all of you when it is safe and keeping you in my thoughts until then.

Warmly,

Urmimala